Unbelievably, the data Professor Houndsman retrieved through his “LAPPER” confirmed that Planet Er-Satz is exactly the same size as Planet Earth and has all the same landmasses, oceans and atmosphere, including a sun and moon, just like ours. It turns out that this planet is an exact clone of Planet Earth, and was even created at exactly the same moment in time that Earth was created. Amazingly, Planet Er-Satz also has cities, towns, mountains, lakes and rivers, all identical to ours.The planet contains famous landmarks that look exactly like Mount Rushmore, Yellowstone National Park, the Eiffel Tower, Big Ben, the Statue of Liberty, Red Square, famous an infamous this planet has it. Furthermore, this planet had all the same historical events we experienced, and they all occurred at the very same moment in time that they happened on Earth. On Planet Er-Satz everything is an exact duplicate of everything that ever existed on Earth. Well almost everything, there is one important and unique difference that sets Planet Er-Satz apart from Planet Earth. It turns out that there are only animals on this great planet and they possess the same intelligence us humans enjoy on Earth.

Some of Planet Er-Satz’s most famous inhabitants are what we call on Planet Earth, “Man’s Best Friend“. Yes, many of this planet’s dogs were the sports heroes, entertainers, politicians, educators, explorers, industrialists, great artists and more. So roll-over the pages, paw through the text and meet some of the most famous dogs in Planet Er-Satz’s history, and remember we’re not alone......Have Pun.

Professor Beasley Houndsman lll was the astronomer that made this astonishing discovery and during a worldwide press conference officially named this new planet, “Planet Er-Satz”. Professor Houndsman is best known for his invention of the revolutionary “Laser Activated Power Pack Energy Retriever”, ”LAPPER” for short. This masterful invention enabled the Professor to communicate with the inhabitants of Planet Er-Satz and was instrumental in helping him gather the following, fascinating information about this spectacular planet.

MUTTHAMMAD ALLEY
Mutthammad Alley was born Cassius Muttcellus Clay, Jr. on January 17, 1942 in Kennelville, Kentucky. Clay fought under his birth name and drew worldwide attention by winning the Gold Collar in the light-heavyweight division at the1960 Olympawic Games held in Rome. After he won his first World Heavyweight Championship fight he decided to change his name to Mutthammad Alley. He used the first part of his middle name, Muttcellus to form his new first name, and chose Alley as his new last name because of his fond memories of playing in the alley behind his doghouse as a young pup. As great as Alley was as a boxer, his rise to prominence was also attributed to his incredibly outgoing personality.

Mutthammad’s boxing skills, along with his role as a spokes dog for animal rights catapulted him into idol status amongst a large group of his fellow canines. His massive celebrity appeal further enhanced his staying power as the top dog in his sport. Mutthammad’s fights with Sonny “The Pit Bull” Liston helped build his now legendary status, but sadly in 1967 he lost his heavyweight title for refusing to take heartworm pills while in training. Alley was allowed to resume fighting in 1970, and in 1974 he regained the heavyweight championship by defeating George Pawman, only to lose it in 1978 to young “ Leash-on “ Spinks. Mutthammad’s other memorable fights were with Joe “ The Rottweiler “ Frazier, Ken “ Dog Pen “ Norton and Trevor Berbark. Since his retirement Alley has traveled the world spreading good will to all dog kind.

THE BEAGLES
This British Rock Group skyrocketed to International fame and fortune in the 1960’s and had a profound influence on the course of popular music, which continues even today.

The Beagles, known as the “Fab Furr“ were born and raised in Liverpooch, England. The band consisted of Paul MuttCartney, John “Give Pets a Chance“ Lennon, George “My Schnauzer Gently Weeps“ Harrison and Ringo Paw. Lennon and MuttCartney had played together in a group called the “Quarry Dogs“ and later, with Harrison and Ringo formed the “Silver Beagles“. Shortly after changing the bands name to the now famous “Beagles“, these young pups recorded their first record, “Love Me Do Do“ and “Please, Please Releash Me“. Their recording, “I Want To Hold Your Paw“ in 1964 marked the beginning of what became known internationally as “Beaglemania“. The Beagles traveled the world performing many live concerts in sold out stadiums packed with enthusiastic admirers. You could hardly hear the music above the howling, whining and barking of the tens of thousands of faithful Beagle fans who constantly begged for more.

The Beagle’s innovative films, “A Hard Days Bite“ and “Yelp“ were received enthusiastically by huge audiences. The “Fab Furr“ produced an extraordinary variety of albums such as “Rubber Bone”, “Roll-Over“ and what is considered probably their best work, “Sgt. Pawper’s Lonely Hounds Club Band“. In 1970 the group disbanded after the release of their final album “Let it Flea”.

ELVIS PETSLEY
“YOU AIN’T NOTHIN’ BUT A POUND DOG“
Elvis was born in Tupawlo, Mississippi on January 8, 1935 and although he did not invent “Rock and Roll“, he certainly did more than any other petformer in history to popularize this relatively new form of music.

Starting in the mid 50’s, Petsley became known as the “The King “ and with his powerful voice, sexy mannerisms, and dog-gone good looks he would pound out hit after hit. Elvis’s success started early with his recording of “That’s all Right Lhasa“, which began a string of hits that included “House Break Hotel“ in 1956, followed by “Hound Dog”, “Don’t Chew the Stool“, “Pat me Tender“ and “I’m all Leashed Up”. His television appearances and live concerts drew large audiences. Elvis also starred in 30 plus movies such as “Doghouse Rock”, and “Sniffing You." Wherever Elvis went he was besieged by autograph hounds, and there were many times in public that he would have to flea for his life. Whenever Elvis would release a new song his fans would go crazy, often gnawing and scratching the front doors of record stores across the country, waiting for them to open.

Even after “The Kings“ death in 1977 his fame and legend continued to grow. To this day his estate fetches huge income from his ever-increasing cult status.

THE WIZARD OF PAWS
This extremely popular fantasy, written in 1900 by Fido “Can’t pass up a Hydrant” Baum tells the story of Dorothy, a young farm puppy from Kansas who was carried away by a tornado to a strange and wonderful land called Paws.

For Dorothy to return home to Kansas she must travel to Paw’s capital, the Emerald City and ask assistance from the mysterious “Wizard of Paws” himself. Along the way she meets three trusted companions that will accompany her on the journey to see the Wizard. Dorothy’s new friends are Rinny-Tinny, a tree-chopping hound, Chowardly, a mutt that looks like a lion, and a matted, fur-balled mongrel who has spent his entire life as a scarecrow. These four new friends go through a series of interesting adventures on their way to the Emerald City, including run-ins with the “Wicked Wolfhound of the West”.

The Land of Paws emerges as a more interesting place than Kansas, despite the main theme of the story that “There’s No Place Like Home“.

This novel was adapted into one of the most famous and popular films ever made, starring Judy Pawland as Dorothy.

HUNCHBARK OF NOTRE DANE
The Hunchbark of Notre Dane is the English title of Notre Dane deParis, Victor Pawgo’s greatest historical romance novel, which set the fashion for fictional writings of the past.

The story characterizes French Romutticism and revolves around a beauty-and-the-beast theme. It tells the story of how the selfless love of the deformed bell ringer, Quasimongrel is contrasted with the villainous lust of the Cathedral’s Archdeacon, Claude Fur-ello, for the beautiful gypsy Esmeralda, Paris’s most beautiful French Poodle.

This fascinating tale is very melodogmatic, its descriptions of medieval Paris and its underworld are quite realistic. Victor Pawgo’s story is filled with many ironic twists and turns that keep the reader anxiously turning the pages of this fast paced adventure.

The novel shows the romutticist’s love for the absurdly distorted and proved to the world that most dogs who lived in medieval times had to work hard to survive. Throughout the city lower class mutts had a difficult time finding a compatible mate who wasn’t on unemployment. Because of this, many of Paris’s best veterinarians were forced to find a new profession or starve. More importantly, the majority of the city’s female mutts found it extremely difficult to scrape together enough money to afford a plastic surgeon.

GROUCHO BARKS
Groucho was an integral part of the famous brother comedy team “The Barks Brothers“, which included “ Chico,” Harpo,” and sometimes “ Zeppo, “ and “ Gummo.”

Groucho was a leering, bushy browed, mustached wisecracker who always seemed to be chomping on a cigar, he became the best known member of this talented litter.The Barks Brothers rarely behaved normally and their madcap humor resulted in spontaneous lunacy whenever the mood struck them, and it was Groucho who usually lead this crazy pack.
Groucho and his brothers filmed many movies which included “The Cocomutts“ in 1925, “Animal Crackers“ in 1928, “Doggie Business“ in 1931 “Hounds Fur“ in 1932, and their now classic, “Dawg (Bone) Soup“ in 1933. Also “A Bite at the Opera“ in 1935, “A Day on the Leashes“ in 1937 and “Grooming Service“ in 1938.

The team disbanded in 1941 and only Groucho succeeded as a solo performer, mainly as the aggressive, double- talking host of the hit radio and television quiz show, “You Bet Your Leash“.

Groucho Barks died at his dog house on August 19,1977, his long-time personal vet said at his funeral, “There never was and never will be a funnier dog than Groucho Barks.